• faltryka@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    6 months ago

    Yeah I am married to an autistic person and they think that they are being explicit and clear but are absolutely not. It harms their relationships all over the place and they are constantly thinking less of other people over it.

    When you have this problem communicating with everyone, you’re the problem.

    • Gnome Kat@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      6 months ago

      You should look up the double empathy problem. Its been shown that autistic people don’t struggle to communicate or be understood by other autistic people. Its only between autistic and non autistic people where the issues arise but only one side gets all the blame when the failure is both ways.

    • aleats@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      6 months ago

      Sounds like the person you’re married to is kind of a dick, honestly. Thinking less of other people for not understanding your own unclear language just shows a massive lack of introspection. As a local autism, though, I definitely disagree with the last point, as a significant difference between someone who has autism and someone who doesn’t is that language is understood differently (I would know), and that means you can both understand and be understood incorrectly very easily. This post is kind of deliberately divisive anyway, but I believe the point of saying something and being misunderstood, despite your best efforts (hopefully), still stands.

    • iiGxC@slrpnk.net
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      6 months ago

      Yeah it’s super easy (autistic or not) to think you’re being very clear when you have the full idea in your head, but you’re actually not. It’s like if you’re trying to describe a purple elephant and say “the thing that moves around and is purple and has a trunk”. Those words clearly describe a purple elephant if you already have the concept at the forefront of your mind, but for somebody without a purple elephant in mind, you could just as well be describing a purple car or a guy from the purple equivalent of the blue man group carrying around a big chest of clothes or a purple tree that can move around.

    • Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      6 months ago

      If non-autistic people are constantly misunderstanding autistic people maybe there should be some meeting in the middle instead of broadly declaring neurodivergent people to be the problem.

      • Soulg@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        6 months ago

        They did not in any way “declare neuro divergent people to be the problem.”

        If you go around your day and are constantly being misheard, it’s more likely that you’re mumbling than it is that every other person just has bad hearing.

        • Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          6 months ago

          Their comments are making broad statements about autistic people and putting the onus of understanding solely on them, when communication is a two way street.

          “Everyone” doesn’t have trouble understanding autistic people; other autistic people are more able to socialize with autistic people than neurotypical people are. Being a minority just means the people who are able to socialize well with autistic people are outnumbered by people who can’t/don’t/won’t.