I’m referring to both “lol lmao why am I putting this leaf in” posts and “omg I found a leaf in my chipotle” posts here because both have the same issue of broadcasting their confusion over the internet instead of just looking it up.

You could chalk this up to social media but even before that’s advent you had Jamie Oliver showing you a 30 min dinner that consists of leftover ingredients that are not picked up by his show / cookbook and also assumes you’re cooking on kitchen grade equipment instead of the landlord special like most of his presupposed target audience and feel free to swap him for any number of aspiritional celebrity cooks.

It’s all showstuff. Which can be nice but let’s be honest here, if you’re cooking a lot at home you’ll be eating slop (non derogatory) most of the time because between price and time investment that’s what gets you tasty, manageable, affordable.

But that’s not in the cookbooks, I’m pretty sure I own all of them because if you’re a known home cook they just end up at your house. If you ate nothing but Jamie Olivers Healthy 30 min Dinners (all of them take about an hour or so because they presuppose you start with a 10L boiling pot of water and have the skills necessary to dice a large onion in a minute) you’d end up nutritionally deficient and poor.

But say you were to google lense your bay leaf and find out what it does, where does that leave you? I feel like there isn’t a site in the world that teaches you home economics cooking where you concoct up something healthy, tasty and time saving out of like half a pantry and a capsicum you bought on sale. I speak two languages and I’ve never found one - where the fuck are they?

  • ToastedRavioli@midwest.socialEnglish
    6·
    9 days ago

    I have reached a point of cooking where most all of my meals are made virtually the same way, but it would not make for a sexy video tutorial despite being easy to do and tasty.

    1. Preheat oven to 400°
    2. Pick whatever vegetable(s) you want, cut them up however you want, and put them in a large pyrex dish with avocado oil or olive oil. (Avocado oil preferred due to high heat tolerance)
    3. Set timer for 60 minutes after putting the pan in the oven
    4. Pull out whatever protein you want, and let it warm up on the counter for 30 minutes. Heat up a cast iron skillet while you fuck off to watch tv or something
    5. At 30 minutes remaining on your timer, start cooking your protein in the now hot skillet. Fuck off to watch tv or something again
    6. At 15 minutes, flip your protein over. Fuck off again
    7. With 5 minutes or so remaining, put your cast iron in the oven to finish cooking your protein and fuck off again for 5-10 minutes.
    8. Enjoy all of your food hot and ready at the same time

    This is how I cook almost everything, with minor modifications. Making fish? Dont finish it in the oven. If making chicken? Marinate the chicken starting 30 mins before you start doing the veggies, so that you start cooking the chicken after 1 hour of marinating. Making tacos? Add a step to heat up some torts in the oven. Want thicker vegetables like acorn squash? Start that at 90 mins and then add the rest of the veggies at 60 minutes. Want onions? Start the rest of the vegetables and then add the onions at 30-45 mins remaining.

    The overall process stays the same, and you are simultaneously a great cook and being lazy as fuck the whole time you are cooking