Red_October [he/him]

I feel like they didn’t need an orbital space laser to take out liberty prime. You could, potentially tie up its feet like an AT-AT, or you could tell it the capitalist paradise doesn’t exist and its head will explode.

I was just doin it for fun

Fuck these guys they sound like Trots.

Spoken like someone who’s never had the privilege of holding a pink-toed tarantula’s paw-pad.

Yeah these quotes always sounded like they came out of the same G.I. Joe figurine.

This might be smarter than me but I am taller than it

The new Slaverian Trucker update?

Israel also literally is just us. They’re our military base pretending to be a country. We set them up, gave them the weapons, entirely financially support them, and an estimated 15-20% of IOF scum were either born in the U.S. or have dual citizenship. Libs always fucking hate that last bit as if we haven’t seen tons of fucks from NYC kicking Palestinians out of their homes so they can live in them.

“I got you!” “No you didn’t!!”

Thanks, I’m super proud of her. She’s been handling it really well and she’s very self aware of how she’s feeling. I hope you’re doing well now!

Did you guys spend like five minutes punching up into the air right in front of each other and move like you were under water?

I had the balls but they weren’t part of the costume

Last year I was a tanuki. I got into a fight with a gas station attendant and the leaf on top of my head kept bobbing back and forth while I was yelling at him. That was really funny.

This year I’m going as a guy who’s washing dishes until midnight as a side job while my wife is home sick and pregnant.

Oh no I don’t love Jane Fonda. Just that pic.

Lol that pic used to be the background on my phone. I’m pretty Fonda Hanoi Jane.

Wouldn’t be surprised if the outage was caused by Palantir getting a shit load of new data suddenly.

When these ring cameras came out I got into an argument with a friend, who got one immediately, that they were just advanced tools for state surveillance.

I think I said something like, sure you can’t put a CCTV camera on every civilian door in the U.S. (also pointed at their neighbors) but you can sure as hell sell them their own.

SHOEBILLS MENTIONED! I have autism and got obsessed with those guys for like five years!

They do this thing where they clack their beaks and it sounds like an AK47 going off. They can also eat like every other animal. Two are born to each mother and the stronger sibling stomps the smaller one to death immediately for some reason and I guess the mom is like, “That’s my boy.”

They’re also extremely friendly to humans. They fucking bow to humans and you’re supposed to fucking bow back. If you’re a human they really like, they will pull off one of their feathers and GIVE THEM TO YOU!

Gotta hand it to him on going vegan.

It would help if companies like fucking Amazon didn’t sell fake ICE gear to anyone who wants to impersonate the gestapo.

Amazon. Same company that flooded strikers with freezing water in sub-zero temperatures in NYC.

Still waiting on the job offer from the DPRK for all the free propaganda I’ve written for them.