Unfortunately a lot of the sadly beliefs I’ve accumulated seem to be self conclusions, not so much people being dicks (and telling me I’m worthless, etc - that was my own innovation).
I’m starting to unpick these (at 46!!) but it’s bloody slow progress
Even if nobody told you that you’re worthless, that belief came from somewhere. You didn’t invent it for yourself.
Maybe someone told you with their actions, or with subtext. Maybe it happened when you were so young that you hadn’t even started forming permanent memories yet. Maybe society told you with the default set of assumptions it handed you and called “normal”.
Whatever it is, blaming yourself for it is just another sneaky way that idea is influencing your opinion of yourself. It’s society telling you “all your problems are your own fault; society had nothing to do with your internalized beliefs about yourself.” Which, in case it needs to be stated, is a lie.
Still struggling on the deprogramming.
Unfortunately a lot of the sadly beliefs I’ve accumulated seem to be self conclusions, not so much people being dicks (and telling me I’m worthless, etc - that was my own innovation).
I’m starting to unpick these (at 46!!) but it’s bloody slow progress
Even if nobody told you that you’re worthless, that belief came from somewhere. You didn’t invent it for yourself.
Maybe someone told you with their actions, or with subtext. Maybe it happened when you were so young that you hadn’t even started forming permanent memories yet. Maybe society told you with the default set of assumptions it handed you and called “normal”.
Whatever it is, blaming yourself for it is just another sneaky way that idea is influencing your opinion of yourself. It’s society telling you “all your problems are your own fault; society had nothing to do with your internalized beliefs about yourself.” Which, in case it needs to be stated, is a lie.