Wren

Lemvotes shows votes. So, it’s not private.

Their sexual orientation/preferences.

Okay. You have clearly made up your mind that this is factually and unarguably transphobic so I’m going to step out of the discussion. It seems, nuance has no place here.

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I’ve encountered a few. Not getting involved, but I’ve seen a few of what you’re describing.

It doesn’t.

You seem to be making “attractive” a catch all for everything that supports your point here.

At the end of the day, someone can chose to not date a transgender person without being a transphobe. Just like I can chose not to date someone that is 7 feet tall without saying they’re ugly.

It’s okay to not be into someone for whatever reason you’re not into them. This guy was not obligated to date her from the beginning.

It’s not so easy to define though. Gender reassignment has gotten so good that it’s impossible to tell. Which is an amazing thing! However, there are people that have preferences based on criteria they set that determine and influence both who they find attractive, and what situations they are willing to accept in a mate. For instance, I personally don’t like country music. Am I a southphobe? A redneckist? No, but I don’t want to be in a relation with someone that listens to it. It’s not my thing. Yet I am not hateful towards those that enjoy it and in-fact, have many friends that love it.

Now imagine I’m on a date, and it comes up during dinner that they love country music. It’s going to be a no for me. That doesn’t make me hateful.

That some people don’t want their mate to have been assigned the same gender as them isn’t transphobia. It’s just a preference. He doesn’t want to deal with her having once been the same gender as him. That is HIS preference. And it is okay. If he is not hateful, or disrespectful, I’d say it’s not transphobia.

But I’m not the authority on the subject. I’m just trying to add some nuance to the topic. Nothing more.

That’s simply just not true though.

Transphobia doesn’t mean “refuses to be romantically with tranksfolk”. It means basically that a belief exists that consists of negative attitudes, feelings, or actions towards transgender, or transsexual people, or just transness in general.

People are not obligated to be in a relationship with a trans person just because they are the preferred gender. Again, they are allowed preferences. And while they can be kind and supportive of transgenderism, they don’t have to include them in their romantic preferences.

Regarding the edit: That’s totally fair. I understand.

As far as the rest. Yeah. I see the point. However, I don’t think it was that he thought of her as less attractive, just outside of his wheelhouse. Take for example, my point about preferences, someone can be into people taller than them. It’s their thing. So if they need soomeome shorter, they may still find said person gorgeous, but the height is a deal-breaker.

With this, it might just be that he doesn’t wan to be with someone that was once the same gender as him. We really can’t know why- but I’d have to agree with a few of the responses- I really don’t think I’d accuse h of being anti-trans. From the info given, he wasn’t offensive or rude, just surprised and kindly backed out.

I hope this doesn’t come off as argumentative, as that is not how it’s meant, but the way I see it, it wasn’t that he didn’t like her, or was transphobic, it’s just that he has preferences. This isn’t a crime. We all have preferences. Be they height, weight, cultural, tradition, what-have-you… this doesn’t make us anti-things outside of our prefered choices.

For example: I like pumpkins. Love them as decorations, I think they’re pretty, I know they’re heathy as a food and good for nature, however… I don’t like to eat them at all. I don’t like the texture of pumpkin pie, I don’t like the flavor at all. It’s just not to my taste.

Am I anti-pumpkin? Not even in the slightest.

The point is, from what you said, he was kind to her, and wasn’t offended or being offensive TO her, he just wasn’t into her situation at all.

Maybe this helps to understand it better?

Again, absolutely no offense intended.

Gus?

Vibe coding isn’t game development. It’s slop development by hacks that don’t know game development.